Why does body image matter?
The way we think and feel about our bodies affects our health and wellbeing, social relationships and how we show up in the wider world. Sadly, research shows children are questioning their bodies at a younger and younger age (as young as three years old in some cases) and the number of children and teenagers feeling like their bodies aren’t good enough is increasing at a rapid rate.
Body image issues don’t just affect how kids engage in class - they affect whether they will turn up to class in the first place. Body image can also determine whether children and teenagers will take part in sports and exercise activities, and if they are likely to experience more serious mental health issues such as anxiety, eating disorders, depression or low self-esteem.
On a wider societal level, body image is a social justice issue too, as evidence shows appearance based bullying is the most common form of bullying, with children and teens in higher weight bodies being 63% more likely to be bullied according to The World Health Organisation.
Weight stigma also impacts people’s access to equitable healthcare and, for adults, weight stigma can mean being actively discriminated against at work (and can also determine whether they are offered a job interview in the first place).
Creating body happy spaces isn’t just about allowing children to feel good on an individual level, it’s about allowing them to be more accepting of other children who may not look like themselves, and to feel safe to celebrate their unique identity regardless of what they look like.
But what about health?
This question is based on a particular idea of health that, culturally, we have come to accept as the norm. It assumes that we can measure health by the way that someone looks and the shape of their body, and that health only consists of what we eat and how much we move. It ignores the nuance and wider perspective, the impact of weight stigma and weight cycling (the process of losing and gaining weight) on health and all the social determinants of health - ie. the impact of trauma, oppression, socio-economics and geographical location to name just a few.
When we think about health, then, we need to reexamine what it means to “be healthy”. Does it mean treating our bodies with kindness, engaging in health promoting behaviours, looking after our mental and spiritual health as well as our physical health, eating and moving in a way that feels good, getting enough rest, prioritising social connection and time outside? Or does it mean striving to make our bodies fit what we believe a healthy body looks like? Because these are two different things.
It’s also important to note that the way we think and feel about our bodies directly impacts how we treat our bodies. Research shows children who have low body image are less likely to engage in health promoting behaviours and more likely to engage in behaviours that actively risk their health. When we prioritise promoting positive body image and creating spaces that nurture kids’ body image, then, we can see this has a direct, positive impact on health.
I want to promote positive body image for my kids but I don’t know where to start.
The fact that you are here, reading this, shows that you are already halfway there. Part of the issue is the fact negative body image is so normalised that we’re often not even aware of a) the damage it can cause and b) how to spot the negative messages in the first place. This is where we can help!
Learning about body image is a process and it takes time, but it’s an investment worth making because it will have a direct impact on the physical, mental and emotional wellbeing of the children in your care (and maybe even yourself too!).
Some things you can do right now to begin your journey:
Buy a copy of the book Body Happy Kids, How To Raise Children and Teens Who Love The Skin They’re In by our founder Molly Forbes.
Download some of our free resources
Sign up to a Body Happy Kids workshop for teachers
Download some of our teaching materials
Buy a book from the Body Happy Bookshop (each one comes with a supporting document to help you get the most from it with the children in your care, whether you’re a parent or teacher)
How should I deal with family or friends who body shame themselves or others in front of my kids?
Setting clear boundaries around this subject is really important, both to protect your children from being exposed to conversations which may make them question their own bodies and the bodies of people around them, and for yourself. This can be challenging though, when body shame, diet talk, a weight normative view of health (see above!) and appearance ideals are the norm. It is possible to set and affirm boundaries without getting into a big debate about the subject though - remember, everyone is at a different stage in their own process and on their own path with this stuff.
It’s likely the people who you may need to have these conversations with are also some of the most important people in your child’s life - teachers, extended family, close family friends. So rather than having a heated argument you could appeal to these people’s love of your children. Explain how these conversations may harm them (perhaps you have your own experience you can draw on to help you convey this) and why you are working hard to protect them from being exposed to these ideas. Invite them to join you as you learn about this subject together. Perhaps you could read Body Happy Kids together or sign up to The Masterclass, or download some of the free resources to look through.
Depending on the age of your child you can also have a conversation with them about it too. Explain that not everyone has the same values, experience or perspective of the world, and that, as a family, ideas that say some bodies are better than others, or that we must change the way our body looks to earn respect, love or success, are not what you stand for or believe in. Take a zero tolerance approach to appearance based teasing or bullying (even in jest) and continue to protect those boundaries. It’s not about encouraging everyone to agree with your point of view, it’s about asserting a boundary that will protect your child’s wellbeing, health and happiness.
How can I help my kids make healthy choices without promoting body ideals?
Health is a multi-layered and nuanced subject. It’s not just about what we eat and how much we move our body. Rather than using moral language that puts some foods on a pedestal and vilifies others, consider taking a food neutral approach and encourage “more nutrient dense foods” rather than less of anything else. Talk about the importance of sleep, how too much screen time isn’t good for us, the positive impact of spending time outside and being in nature, how great it can feel to move our body (and how fun it is when we find an activity we enjoy!) and how important it is for our health to spend time with other people connecting in real life rather than just through a screen.
What books can I buy to help promote positive body image at home / school?
Check out our shop for a range of books we endorse (we are constantly adding to the titles we stock!), buy them direct from us and get a free downloadable activity sheet to go with that book. Buying from us means you can support our work, and get some extra free resources too! Just tick whether you’re a parent or teacher at checkout and we will send you the relevant sheet when we ship your book order.
What books can I read to find out more on this subject for myself?
Body Happy Kids, How To Raise Children Who Love The Skin They’re In by our founder Molly Forbes. Buy it here. For a full reading list of other books and podcasts, we recommend signing up to a teacher workshop or purchasing our Masterclass download pack.
Resources
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